Sometimes, when we’ve been put through the ringer and make it to the other side, we forget to remember to thank those who helped to pull us from the wreckage. This is to be expected, right? It’s human nature to be egocentric and become so focused on our own trials and tribulations, it’s difficult to see beyond the all-encompassing trauma. When we finally are able to break free, we, hopefully, start to focus on healing. We must find the time to rebuild from within. This is no easy task.
So, although there were likely many people who consciously or intangibly helped us to begin again, we have a tendency to forget to extend our thanks. This doesn’t mean we’re unthankful, ungrateful for what they’ve done. We couldn’t have made it to where we’re at without an extra helping hand.
It’s important, though, to take a moment to thank those who pulled us from our wreckage, especially when we didn’t have the strength or courage to do so ourselves. Perhaps there was a loved one who pulled us through. Maybe it’s those in the support group we attended, at church or at our jobs. Maybe it’s our yoga instructor, that waitress at the restaurant we go to who offered us free coffee when we needed a break to collect our thoughts. The point is, the help received could be as blatant as extending finances, giving us a place to stay or offering us a lift. It could also be as inadvertent and simple, however, as extending a listening ear or a small gift that helped us get by.
I challenge you to take a moment to consider all of the individuals who helped make you who you’ve become today – those in your immediate support system and even those who have no idea they supported you. There are likely more than you think.
Are there ways in which you can actively extend your gratitude? Perhaps a stranger offered you his seat on the bus, and this person will never be seen again. But, what about that teacher who told you to believe in yourself no matter what? Or, the counselor who told you to hold on, brighter days are coming? Where are they now?
Are they reachable, and do you have the courage to reach them?
We all have to get to a place in which we feel whole enough to look beyond our ourselves and our life circumstances and feel like we can give our energy to others. Baby steps. If you feel like your struggles are still separating you from taking the next step in your journey, hang tight a while. Make sure you’ve focused on the parts that need to be healed, so when you do venture out, those who you approach see and feel that healing.
Brighter days are coming. The pain will dissipate. Focus on the present, release the past, and don’t worry about the future. And, remember, one day at a time. Fake it until you make it. I heard a quote once that stuck with me and is a daily reminder to keep working hard to move forward – “You’ll never be 100 percent motivated, so you must focus on being 100 percent disciplined.”
This quote can apply to so many different aspects of life – from family care to personal care, our careers, and trauma healing. I realize that the very word “discipline” generally carries with it a negative connotation. But, it is also just another word for motivation and focused. Stay disciplined in your journey and determined to love yourself enough to heal.
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. Take that step and remember only to look back long enough to thank those who encouraged you to. Many blessings, you’ve got this.