Are all narcissists well off? No. Do all narcissists want others to believe they are? Probably. Narcissists, particularly somatic, flaunt possessions and often spend lavishly. They take pride in any possessions they accumulate, including significant others, “trophy” partners they can flaunt to the rest of the world. These individuals are not separate human beings to their narcissistic partners, but rather, extensions of self. They exist to make the narcissist look good, just like his car or his home, or his business cards. Take these away, peel back the layers, and the narcissist incurs injury. They cannot tolerate being exposed. They can’t stand for others to see them as lesser, or even on the same level as themselves. They need to be viewed as more significant, better in every way. So, even if the narcissist isn’t wealthy, she will pretend to be. She will keep up the facade as long a possible. If money runs out, she will seek a new partnership to fill her glass or otherwise lie, cheat and steal her way to additional funds. He will find any means to protect his false sense of grandiosity regardless of cost. Should finances deplete and the narcissist run out of options, he will still desperately try to maintain his lavish lifestyle for as long as possible, letting bills pile up but not curtailing spending until all is lost.
Narcissists particularly throw their money around and flaunt their belongings during the idealize stage of a relationship — in the beginning when he’s still trying to bait his prey. This is the most important point in the relationship to secure control, and the narcissist will do whatever it takes to make sure his target believes he can love and support her in every way possible, particularly if she is not as well off. Most don’t necessary care if their mates are not financially stable — they enjoy the additional level of dependency. Allowing the narcissist to gain control because the victim physically needs his assistance makes his conquest easier. It is difficult to determine what is actually in the narcissist’s pocketbook. He will keep it close to his chest. And, he will insist on taking control of the budget and all household spending. So, when a couple is broke, one half of the equation is often the last to know. If a victim has any inclination that they will soon be on the streets, it would likely be well worth investigating deeper.